David Launches a New Word: Bzik

As promised in this post's title, my intention today is to launch (re-launch?) a word that I learned years ago from my parents that seems to have since disappeared: "Bzik".

Last March I was in a conversation with a couple of colleagues and one of them was talking about something that drives her crazy. I said, "That sounds like a bzik". She didn't know what I was talking about so someone else in the car did some Googling and came up empty, mostly because we had no idea of its spelling. I called my Mom while still in the car with these people (given that I knew for sure that she knew the word) and on speaker-phone she answered "Hi Lover Dover!" and then went on to say that she knew the word but didn't know how it was spelled either.

That sent me off on a search that quickly confirmed what I was beginning to suspect: There was a hole in the Internet. The word simply wasn't out there. I posted on Facebook and nobody could help me, though several tried.

Finally, on March 6th at 10:48 am Eastern, I found it in a Polish dictionary:  
Bzik [b'źik] (think of the 'zh' in Brezhnev, if that helps).


What's it mean?  

First of all its a noun. I'd explain it as a light madness or mania; a petty annoyance taken to the level of an eccentricity. A pet peeve on steroids.

It's something you have. It's a part of you. It's a defining characteristic.

Instead of using it in a sentence, I'll give you some examples:

• One of my daughters' bziks is "mouth noises". It drives her crazy when people slurp their soup, swish their saliva around, or...you name it.
• Another of my daughters has a bzik related to being shushed. I wouldn't call her disgust related to compost or sink-strainer-residue a bzik (just by way of comparison); that's more of a revulsion than a mania. It's also a convenient excuse.
• Amongst her thousands of bziks, my wife has a visceral reaction - a madness so to speak - when it comes to clothes on the floor. Or maybe a better example, because it's more eccentric, is her bzik related to upside-down loaves of bread. I kid you not - try inverting a loaf of bread around her some time and you'll see what I mean.

It's actually quite therapeutic to come to grips with your own bziks (and fun to call someone else on theirs). Attaching that label let's you manage bzik-related encounters with significantly more grace. It allows you to discuss it. To give it form. To neatly step around it as you navigate life.

And, by the way, when it comes to the bziks of your loved ones - they're a lot of fun to activate; each bzik is a button just waiting to be pressed.

Thankfully, I was born bzik-free. Nothing bothers me. I especially don't have a bzik related to careless spelling and grammar. People borrowing my stuff without asking doesn't affect me one bit. Being told what to do doesn't get under my skin at ALL. IT DOESN'T DRIVE ME AT ALL CRAZY WHEN F*ING INCONSIDERATE A*HOLE DRIVERS STOP AT A LIGHT IN THE RIGHT-TURN LANE WHEN THEY'RE NOT EVEN TURNING AND THEY CLEARLY SEE YOUR SIGNAL LIGHT FLASHING AND HAVE AN EMPTY LANE TO THEIR LEFT.

Anyhoo. You get the picture.

Please spread the word. Let's bring it back to life. Let's fix the hole in the Internet.

You may now return to your day...David