I Am Not a Nerd

As a result of a few conversations I had with family and friends this weekend, I've realized that there's a gross misconception out there that I'm a nerd.

Imagine my shock as that revelation slowly took hold. People think I'm a nerd? Me? A nerd? Me? ME???!?!?

I will admit that when I was much, much younger - like in early- to mid-childhood - somebody who knew me only casually might have reached the conclusion that in some small ways, my appearance and behaviour was somewhat nerd-like. Blame my mom for dressing me in polyester pants, and my sisters for being so numerous and stifling, and my dad for wearing horn-rimmed glasses and an abacus in his white shirt pocket (and for teaching me backgammon and ping pong instead of fishing and hunting). But appearances can deceive, and I think the fact that I was a kick-ass jacks player and hopscotch king should be taken into consideration before passing judgement.

(In the absence of a real picture from my childhood, I include below a representative likeness as an illustration of what I kind of, sort of, might have looked like back then).

Anyhow, that was then and this is now. I am decidedly not a nerd and I can prove it:

• Yes, I'm a math grad from Waterloo, but I only took the cool math courses AND I also took non-math electives like Forms of Fantasy, Arthurian Literature, and Future Studies
• Alright, I used to play Dungeons and Dragons...but my character was always a thief - the least nerdy character you can choose
• Sure, two of my favourite novel genres are Science Fiction and Fantasy, but I also read a lot of Historical Fiction. (I should mention that my recent foray into Scott Sigler's Galactic Football League series further illustrates how completely cool I am)
• I run - and not just from bullies
• Given that nerd-ism is an inherited trait, if I were a nerd, you'd expect my daughters to also be nerds, and they're not (I know this because we talked about it over a recent game of Settlers of Catan and they told me they're not)
• Despite having read all of the Game of Thrones books (so far) and watched both seasons, I don't own any paraphernalia (unless you count my "Winter is Coming" Stark mug at the office)
• While I watch Walking Dead religiously, I have never once watched Talking Dead or Comic Book Men (they're on after my bed time)
• And if all of that's not enough, consider this: Nerds constantly make stupid puns and have a really nerdy laugh. My laugh isn't nerdy at all.

QED